Diary of a Suburban Squeen

[I actually wrote this post ages ago and never did anything with it! Also, I am now very far behind.]

Oh, chums. So much theatre, so little time. Qu’est-ce qui se passe, I hear you ask yourselves, dans la vie de la Squeen? Eh bien, I shall tell all.

Charles III – Almeida; May 2014

Terrible confession to make: I was tired like a zombie and ended up leaving at the interval because I couldn’t concentrate on this at all. I’m sure it was terribly good; I did notice interesting use of language.

The Winter’s Tale – ROH; May 2014

I obsessed and obsessed and was rewarded by the opportunity to spend a hilarious amount of money on a ticket to see this again. Fun fact: seats in the stalls circle are great. I continue to love this; the third act wasn’t as weak as I remembered, though I still think the question of Perdita’s identity was resolved too easily and I found Paulina’s role difficult to entirely figure out.

A View from the Bridge – Young Vic; May 2014

This was an amazingly good production. They maintained so much tension throughout the entire play that I almost died (that is barely an exaggeration). I did actually do it at school about a million years ago, but couldn’t really remember much about it. The design was very minimal, basically just a shower and then, later, a deluge of blood, but it needed nothing more. I loved one scene in particular, where Eddy and his wife and Catherine and the brothers were sitting around, having a superficially innocuous conversation and the tension was unbearable!

Privacy – Donmar Warehouse; May 2014

This was a very inventive, interesting play (from the same playwright as what brought us This House) about internet privacy and Edward Snowden and the uses of meta-data etc. Semi-interactive, great use of screens and the internet, loved the comedy retelling and misinterpreting of Romeo and Juliet via meta-data. I did feel it tailed off a bit at the end, to be honest, which was a shame.

Romeo & Juliet – Sadler’s Wells; May 2014

This was… interesting. It was the Scottish National Ballet, who decided to do a production of R&J set in the early c20th, which is fine. They did good things with the music – a bit of sax amongst the Prokofiev, using trolley bells etc. I really liked that, it was very effective. Sadly, the choreography really didn’t fit the music at all – it was a bit weird. Lady Capulet was kind of crazy. Romeo and Juliet – particularly Romeo – were a bit meh, so I didn’t really give a shit about them. On the other hand, Mercutio and Tybalt were GREAT. Basically, the ballet should have been about them. I feel that’s quite often the case.

Titus Andronicus – Globe; May 2014

Ah, the famous swooning production. And people did swoon. It was very distracting, and other audience members kept using it as an excuse to have a chat. But I loved this, it was great. Ridiculous amounts of drama and gore. Titus was mental. Tamora was great (and also a bit mental). Possibly best of all was Ralph (?) from Knight of the Burning Pestle as the brilliantly barking emperor. This was rather a visceral production – Lavinia’s fate was enough to turn anyone’s stomach; what happened to her was dreadful – but I loved how she completely got on board the Andronici’s revenge boat. The satisfaction of the ending was great.

Serenade | Sweet Violets | DGV – ROH; May 2014

Serenade: to be honest, the one thing’s that remained with me about this was the excellent hairography. I did enjoy it at the time. Sweet Violets: I really wanted to like this, and I did like parts, but I don’t think it really worked as a whole. The narrative was in parts too complex. Whilst I enjoyed Steven McRae leaping around as the spirit of Jack the Ripper, I’m not convinced that that theme really worked. The whole thing left me a bit underwhelmed to be honest. DGV – loved this like pie. The set, the music, the choreography all worked so well together. I can’t work out, though, whether Watson and Osipova just keep dancing things where they’re supposed to look like they’re fighting or they just don’t quite trust each other or what.

The Dream | Connectome | The Concert – ROH; June 2014

Dream: so, on the whole I did really enjoy this. Puck was brilliant – the choreography was great and I think it was performed really well. I also loved Helena’s role, that was funny (though I always feel latent guilt at deriving comedy value from a woman desperately chasing after a man). I did feel it was quite a dated production, though. I mean, it was nice, and one can appreciate the classics, but I don’t think it would hurt to modernise the design a little. Connectome: I really, really enjoyed this. The set was amazing, I liked the choice of music, and I just really enjoyed the ballet as a whole (though that middle section where McRae was like Jesus was a bit weird and I struggled to fit it into the rest of the piece, and I stand by my comment re Watson/Osipova). I hope they put it on again. The Concert – this was so beautifully enjoyable! Really, really funny. I adored the Mistake Waltz, and the guy who kept abandoning his wife to chase after Sarah Lamb’s character, and all the faffing with chairs at the beginning and the ridiculous flights of fantasy! Tip top.

The Last Days of Troy – Globe; June 2014

So, this was a retelling of the siege of Troy based on the Iliad and a bit of the Aeneid, and it really fell a bit flat for me. There was very little dramatic tension (and while it is tempting to attribute this to already knowing the story, that clearly has nothing to do with it) – it was just, in the words of Rudge, one fucking thing after another. The acting was bizarrely amateurish in places, very unlike the Globe’s usual standard, and whilst I enjoyed parts of the text, it generally didn’t do much for me.

Fathers and Sons – Donmar Warehouse; July 2014

I enjoyed this very much, largely for Arkady, played by Ferdinand from last year’s Tempest. He’s a young would-be firebrand and revolutionary who’s just finished university and come home, but he’s really too conventional to be a revolutionary, unlike his friend. One of those plays where not much happens, per se, it’s a character play of people working out what’s important to them. Points also to Tim McMullen’s Uncle Paul, unlucky in love and war, but really rather appealing nonetheless.

Tryst: Devotion and Betrayal – Peacock Theatre; July 2014

You know what, some of these pieces didn’t quite work, and some of the dancing was a bit less than great, but I enjoyed this whole programme. The first piece was a pretty standard pas-de-quatre with two couples and I suspect a bit of infidelity, but it was a nice piece of choreography and there were a few striking moments. Then a thing that was supposed to be based on a story with a man and woman falling in love then realising they were siblings separated at a young age, but you’d never have known that without additional explanation, and I found it quite meh and forgettable. Then there was Orbital by Valentino Zucchetti, which I really enjoyed though the dancing in places wasn’t up to the choreography and I lived in fear that someone was going to get kicked in the head. Overall, I thought this had a lot of promise, and I enjoyed the music (Philip Glass’s violin concerto) and the design. Next up, Kristen McNally’s Mad Women, which was absolutely great, by far the best piece of the evening. Sort of 1950s women wielding their sexual power. It was really, really fab, and I loved the mish-mash of old American adverts etc used as music.

The longer ballet of the evening was the Kreutzer Sonata by Andrew McNicol, based on the story by Tolstoy, based on the music by Beethoven. The music was a sort of mash-up of Janacek’s take on the Tolstoy and the original Beethoven, which I thought was woven in an interesting way. The narrative at the beginning was a bit too involved and fragmented, but when it got to the heart of matters it was better. I want to say it was a bit McMillan-ish, but I don’t think I really know enough about ballet at this point to go round saying things like that. I really enjoyed Hayley Blackburn as the wife, she was very good. (It was also thematically very like Sweet Violets.)

Antony & Cleopatra – Globe; July 2014

I enjoyed this. Eve Best was great as Cleopatra, I really liked her performance. I was in a slightly fraught mood at the beginning though, and actually struggled to understand what was going on, which is not something I’m really used to these days! After a while I managed to focus, and then enjoyed it more. I felt the second half dragged a bit, though. It just seemed to take a very long time for everyone to die. Comedy lols for the messenger who kept bringing Cleopatra bad news, and also for eunuch jokes.

Many years ago, I thought it would be fun to catalogue all my theatre trips on my LJ. Obviously – obviously – this is a project that fell by the wayside. But hey, I’ve seen quite a bit of stuff recently, so let’s catch up with my theatrical calendar since the last time we checked (which was a second viewing of the Globe’s excellent Macbeth in October last year). ‘Ware spoilers for anything current. I present a chronological list:

A Midsummer Night’s Dream – Noel Coward Theatre (the Michael Grandage season); October 2013
Oh. My. God. Now, I will be entirely honest. I was tired. I’d already seen a really excellent Dream at the Globe earlier in the year. Also, I’m not the play’s biggest fan. But still. Oh. My. God. This was just really bad – a very confused, completely unengaging production. We left in the interval. I was so disappointed – I was excited about seeing Sheridan Smith, and the Globe’s production had temporarily made me forget that I don’t like the play that much. For some reason, it got really good reviews, which is a source of ongoing mystery.

The Herd – Bush Theatre; October 2013
Already talked about this in an earlier post, it seems.

Mojo – Harold Pinter Theatre; December 2013
Again, another play with great reviews and only middling enjoyment. That is, the play was quite amusing and the cast was great (Ben Whishaw was amazing, natch, and I thought Daniel Mays really stood out, plus Rupert Grint was endearing – their double-act was one of the highlights), but it really didn’t seem to have any point to it. Turned out, according to further reading, that it was supposed to be a play that laid bare the pretensions to power that men have (in a gangster sort of way, that is), but from our point of view it seemed so clear that all the blokes in it were clueless twats that there was no progression at all.

Jumpers for Goalposts – Bush Theatre; December 2013
This – about a really terrible LGBT five-a-side football league in Hull – was absolutely and utterly adorable. That is all. Loved it so much.

The Light Princess – Lyttelton, NT; December 2013
Katie queued to get us day seats for this, and it was a really lovely Christmas-time sort of musical. That is, tbh I thought the book and music were very mediocre, very pedestrian, but it was very well produced and the actors were lovely. I enjoyed it a lot.

Drawing the Line – Hampstead Theatre; January 2014
A Howard Brenton play about the process of partitioning India. Very good, and my first visit to the Hampstead Theatre. Had a very visually effective ending, but really it was its focus on the impossible job handed to the civil servant sent to India to draw a line between India and the notional state of Pakistan that was its strength.

Henry V – Noel Coward Theatre (the Michael Grandage season); January 2014
Oh, this was top notch. Jude Law made a great Henry, and it was just really good fun. Very fast-paced, but I didn’t feel it lost anything from that. They kept in the humour; the set was pretty minimalist but effective; I enjoyed the Chorus. The only downside was that we were right up in the gods and it did mean we spent a lot of time looking at people’s heads. (Also, Jude was no Jamie, but who is?)

The Blackest Black – Hampstead Theatre Downstairs; January 2014
This was kind of weird, about an artist and an astrophysicist or astronomer or something struggling to understand the other’s perspective on the world. I felt the first half, set in an observatory, was stronger than the second, in the artist’s, like, garret or whatevs. Some interesting ideas; interesting lighting.

American Psycho – Almeida; January 2014
Oh my God, this was absolutely ridic and so much fun! Kind of loved some of the musical numbers. I mean, it was a bit stupid, but a great night out. Is it moving to the West End? I’m sure someone said it was.

Ellen Terry with Eileen Atkins – Sam Wanamaker Playhouse; January 2014
So, this was very interesting – basically an interpretation of a lecture that Ellen Terry did or summat, looking at different female roles in Shakespeare, but really I was more interested in the theatre in some ways. Newsflash: it’s so beautiful.

Coriolanus – NT Live (Donmar Warehouse); January 2014
It’s not really proper theatre, I know. And yeah, the way they do the camera-work and editing is kind of weird. Still, I enjoyed this. I won’t lie to you, I do enjoy watching a bit of Tom Hiddleston, he was very good, and Deborah Findlay too, but mostly I liked the scheming politicians; they were great! The pacing was a bit off, though – not of the action/drama per se, but of the narrative – he seemed to rise and fall in the course of about a day’s work in the Senate or whatevs. I don’t know if it was due to cutting the text or what, but that did seem to happen a bit too quickly. But oh, when Coriolanus concedes that his mother’s pleas have worked and he will cease to attack Rome, and the price becomes apparent…

Strangers on a Train – Gielgud Theatre; February 2014
Oh, you know what, I enjoyed this. Very melodramatic and silly, but every element of the design was superb and I like melodrama.

HMS Pinafore – Hackney Empire; February 2014
All male Gilbert & Sullivan. I am so, so glad I went to see this, it was so good and so much fun and just really delightful.

It Just Stopped – Orange Tree Theatre; March 2014
Hmm. I did enjoy this, about a couple stuck in their fortieth-something floor flat and everything stopping working and thinking the apocalypse had come, but it got quite confusing towards the end, and I’m still not quite sure what we were supposed to think was going on.

The Knight of the Burning Pestle – Sam Wanamaker Playhouse; March 2014
This was so funny. Just ridiculously, Monty Python-esque funny. We were practically wetting ourselves laughing. Plus, play-within-a-play (my favourite trope, as I may have mentioned before), and ridic posing and dancing everywhere. Brilliant. Playhouse still beautiful.

Versailles – Donmar Warehouse; March 2014
This was very good. I loved, in the first act, the way they explored these different kinds of people and how the war – and its end – had affected them. The second act, I think, was the strongest – Leonard in France trying to convince the powers that be that making their demands for reparation too harsh – or, not even that, but the precise nature of the demands too economically unreasonable – would only lead to trouble. He had this immense speech about the coal industry in Germany and how the proposed terms would affect it, and it was so compelling and so interesting – utterly absorbing. A few nods to hindsight were amusing (a dig at the individualism of lower-middle class grocers and the potential political ramifications of same). I really enjoyed it – see it if you can!

1984 – Almeida Theatre; March 2014
Wow, this was intense! Just kind of sucked me in. Brilliantly constructed – I loved the repetition of scenes, of phrases, the use of video, the sense of unreality. Very good. I do really feel, though, that the concept of “Big Brother”, the ubiquity of the words these days (not even in the reality TV sense, just in the way it has pervaded our modern culture) renders it less effective in its original context, which is a real shame.

Hullo! I have returned, once more, to share my fulsome thoughts on Life and also Art. To kick us off, let’s have a brief overview of what I’ve been doing. Ein minuten bitte, whilst I consult my diary.

Theatre-wise, since last we met, I saw Macbeth (again) at the Globe. This was just as good – loved everything about it, possibly the witches most of all. I am genuinely pissed off with our education system, though. I was into Shakespeare as a teenager, and my school was really good, AND YET being forced into studying Macbeth for GCSE English was so fucking boring and annoying that I hated it, and it has taken me this long to go and see it again. It’s such a good play, probably one of my favourites; the language is just dazzling. And school almost managed to ruin it. So thanks for that, chaps. I also saw Rory Kinnear’s play, The Herd, which I thought was really good, though the sort of structure of the narrative meant that the ending (not just what happened but how it happened) was painfully apparent. Still, I thought it was a good play; the dialogue really rang true.

I have also, rather late in the day, finally taken advantage of the NTLive broadcasts, and in November saw Alan Bennett’s The Habit of Art and the RSC’s Richard II. The play within a play is one of my favourite tropes, so that was enjoyable. Thought Alex Jennings was spectacularly good as Britten, and loved Adrian Scarborough’s actor desperately trying to find a connection and a point to his part. Also bonus John Heffernan as the assistant stage manager. Richard II was also really good, once I got past the first section. I am a bit of a philistine, but I think the play is a bit boring until Richard gets back from Ireland and it all kicks off, but after that it was great! The broadcast thing is not, of course, a patch on seeing a play live, but it was better than I expected (I think seeing it in a cinema rather than on a little tv screen did help), so I will do that again, I think.

On Tuesday, I went to see Romeo & Juliet at the ROH, which I enjoyed (highlights: the music, always; Prokofiev’s score for R&J is my favourite ballet music, hands down; Mercutio and Tybalt; the scenes with Juliet where her parents are trying to force her to marry Paris (and the way she danced with Paris was great – so unwilling!)). That said, I do think I preferred the National Canadian Ballet production I saw at Sadler’s Wells.

So, that’s that. Saw Thor 2 (very enjoyable) and the new Hunger Games film (ditto). Have done and seen other things too, but nothing much I can be arsed to talk about.

Right, now, I have a confession to make. Despite, as you knowing, being distinctly pro Bard, and despite the fact that the history plays are my favourite, I had not, until now, actually watched The Hollow Crown. I know, I am ashamed. I’ve had the DVD for the better part of a year and everything! And I have still not watched Richard II (I’ve started it about three times and kept getting bored and stopping, but now I know it gets properly good, I shall be watching it soon). I have, however, now watched the Henry IVs and Henry V.

I think Simon Russell Beale is great. I’ve seen him in quite a few things at the National over the years, and he’s always tops. I have to say, however, that I did not enjoy his Falstaff. I almost said he was too seedy, too craven, but of course that’s just Falstaff: what he wasn’t, was charming. He was a rogue, but not a particularly loveable one. I felt that spoiled the dynamic between Hal and Falstaff, because you couldn’t really see why Hal was so fond of him, and lacking that affection, I think Hal came across as a slightly crueller character. That said, I thought Jeremy Irons was brilliant as Henry IV, and the relationship between Henry and Hal was much more affecting than I’ve seen before. Loved John of Lancaster, as usual. Returning to Falstaff, again, that scene at the end of Part 2 (“I know thee not, old man.”), which I almost feel is one of the most tragic lines in Shakespeare, lost a lot of its impact because of my lack of sympathy for Falstaff; frankly, I just wanted Hal to ditch him.

Moving onto Henry V. Oh, Henry V. Well, they sucked 95% of the fun out of that, didn’t they? I thought the acting was great, Tom Hiddleston really pulled it off, Anton Lesser was great as Exeter, I loved the way they chose to do the Crispin’s Day speech, Catherine and Alice and the comedy French is always a delight; but they made some very weird production choices, I thought. I was sad to lose the Southampton section, though I can see why it would be an easy option to chop for time constraints. They cut out everything that was remotely comic (excepting the first scene with Catherine and Alice, which they basically have to keep because otherwise you don’t even know who she is, and a bit of Bardolph/Pistol/Nym). Inevitably, the live action renders the Chorus a tad superfluous, so that what is genuinely quite powerful on the stage becomes voice-over fluff on the screen.

For me, however, the main thing that just confused me was the way they cut out the section with the boys being killed. Except, they didn’t cut it all out. So, Henry has this wonderful, outraged speech that is a reaction to this terrible act by the French soldiers, and Tom Hiddleston delivered it so well, EXCEPT that they cut out the boys being killed so the speech ends up being a reaction to – what? – a couple of French soldiers riding along a hill a mile away? It’s ridiculous, completely disproportionate and makes Henry look like a bit of a dick because then his army is just killing prisoners with zero moral high ground. So weird, especially because it felt like they had really set up to kill at least one boy, and then that plotline fizzled out and, as a viewer, I felt completely wrong-footed.

Has everyone else watched these? Thoughts? Feelings?

Jizzy fucking Chrizzy, will someone please just shoot Osborne. He’s such a fucking tosspot. Please explain to me, Georgie, what the fuck is the point of forcing a whole load of people to go to a Jobcentre every single day. Oh no, wait, there is no point, plus I find it hard to imagine that Jobcentres these days are actually staffed to be able to cope with that level of activity. Just a stupid way of punishing people who can’t get a job. Vile. This Government’s obsession with vilifying the unemployed and in fact anyone who needs any kind of benefit (despite the cold, hard fact that the countless number of people on minimum wage are not in fact making a living wage) is revolting, and the way the majority of the media seem to be playing along with it is doubly so.

In other, more localised news, I had precisely zero 3G this morning (not exactly a surprise) and a similar level of mobile service. So, thanks Orange/EE. Shit as ever. I spent half my way into work trying to text Katie to ask her to take some chicken out of the freezer; will now have to revisit dinner plans. Vexing, vexing. I am so fed up with the lack of service in London. FFS, it’s London. I really don’t understand. I was opposite the Hs of P on Friday afternoon, and there was just no service at all. Honestly, you’d think our noble parliamentarians would have got pissed off to the point of getting it fixed by now. Or probably they have a bubble of wifi and are thus unconcerned by the problems the rest of us face*.

Anyway, in happier news, as previously advertised, went to see the National’s Edward II on Friday. Oh, that was good! I can see why it would be polarising, but I really enjoyed it; their choices really worked for me. The staging was fantastic – loved the shack-of-plotting where baronial whispering went on (set in the middle of the stage, you couldn’t really see inside, but the scenes were projected onto screens – I thought it was a brilliant way of representing all the secret conspiring that went on, and the implicit danger of those meetings). Also there was a comedy portacabin of terror which tickled our fancy. I thought the characterisation of Isabella was fascinating – she seemed simultaneously to have agency and yet to be dependent on the man in power, whether that man be her husband, her lover, or her son (and that final scene with Edward III was mesmerising). That one line, “All live to die, and rise to fall,” I think perfectly captures the mood of the whole play and that medieval view of the progression (or cycle) of life: the wheel of fortune, indeed. All in all, fabulous.

Saturday, as planned, we went to Ham House, where it was fortuitously open cabinet day! Open cabinet day is the best day. An update on Ham House (as I am sure you have been eagerly awaiting): the Duchess’s bathroom smelt very vinegary; the paintings on the staircase have been taken away for cleaning or summat; they’d left the door to the lumber room off the beer cellar unlocked so I had a little look round (it’s full of lumber); we discovered where they must have barred the kitchen door to the outside world; the library was, alas, locked, so we couldn’t go in and instead peered longingly through the window; they’ve got a new second-hand bookshop (thumbs up).

Didn’t do anything on Sunday except roll around the sofa like a would-be potentate whilst Katie brought me a bacon sandwich for lunch and squash & blue cheese riz for dinner. TV watched over the course of the weekend included Agents of SHIELD and, natch, Downton. My feelings on Downton:

1. I’m sorry, I’m not happy about Edith’s fella. Very concerned he’s going to turn into a Nazi. Back to the drawing board there.

2. Well. At least Matthew left a letter with testamentary effect, but I still find it massively a) out of character and b) fundamentally unlikely, given his profession and state in life, that he did not just make a fricking will. And, in fact, he says he never has made a will. Not when he became Robert’s heir. Not when he inherited Ginger Lavinia’s dad’s fortune. Not when he got married. Not when he bought half of Downton. Really? Really? DO NOT BELIEVE.

3. FFS. Cora’s credulity and Robert’s blind bullheadedness are really giving me the pip. I harbour a longstanding fondness for Robert, but he is being a complete dick.

4. Bates should not look twinkly-eyed; it is extremely disconcerting.

5. There is not permitted to be any conspiracy against Anna. Unacceptable.

6. There is an unwavering truth about Downton that has been apparent from the very first: the Dowager is the best thing.

7. The new lady’s maid. No. Must go. Cannot bear all the petty plotting and mean-spiritedness.

8. Rose is annoying, but that chap she danced with was A+ adorable.

9. The footmen are also annoying. Daisy, you deserve better and one day your prince will come.

10. Molesley. Oh, Molesley. No words, really.

Also watched Atlantis, which I have to say I thought was a bit shit, so I probably won’t bother with it again.



* Huh. It’s like a little allegory, right there.

OK, seriously, wtf is this, universe? Did I kill a beautiful child in a former life? What? Please explain to me why my life this week has been so fucking unbearable. To cap off all the other shit that has happened, tonight my wallet was stolen, something which, under the circumstances and in the context of my aforementioned week of raining shit, I think I suffered with admirable calm and aplomb. But now I've just discovered that my monthly travelcard, barely a week old, was on an oystercard that, it turns out, isn't actually registered. So that's £60 worth of travel down the fucking drain which I can ill afford. Plus I've lost my wallet itself, which was lovely and is fairly irreplaceable, and I was late to the theatre because I was faffing around the police station. A pointless exercise, frankly. I cannot lie, LJ: I am genuinely struggling to cope with life at the moment. And I'm PMTed up to the eyeballs on my everfuckinglasting period, and I just need life to get back to some semblance of normality and me to get back on an even keel because I hate feeling so out-of-control like this.

ETA: And my keyboard did something stupid and posted that when I wasn't ready. And my yahoo mail won't work properly at work so I can't reply to anything or forward or start a new message or search.

Trying to be cheerier, we went to see A Woman Killed With Kindness at the National, which really was very good (though I missed the start). Interesting play, and the staging was absolutely super - best I've ever seen, I think.

I have signed up to the Remix - yay! I like a bit of a remix. Dear person mixing me: have at it! I've got a load of fic all over the place - the full list up to six months ago or so is here; more recent stuff is under my fic tag here. (I also have accounts at AO3 and fanfiction.net under the username chaletian.) And I forgot to say on my sign-up, please don't remix Destroyer of Worlds, as that was a remix itself. Thank you!



In other news, chaps, I am feeling very pleased with life at the moment. These bullet points will explain why:

♥ The sun is finally shining! I was actually warm as I sat outside today, eating my lunch without a coat on. Yay sun! This winter has lasted forever.

♥ I just made chocolate and raspberry muffins, and proper orange and mint jelly FROM SCRATCH. I have recently discovered the concept of leaves of gelatine, and have made jelly and panna cotta (tasty tasty); I will not stop here.

♥ Dancing on Ice is bringing me joy. We want Laura to win, and are prepared to invest actual monies to see that dream become reality.

♥ Forgot to say, Katie and I went to see an am dram production of Hay Fever at the Putney Arts Theatre. It was actual hilarious. S - I thought he was dead! J - Oh, he's not dead, he's upstairs.

♥ New bedlinen on Sunday and a bit of a tidy. Bedroom is a haven of deliciousness.

♥ Fuck yeah, Roehampton Asda, you're awesome! I finally went to visit it on a bus, and bought two pairs of linen trousers, two cardigans, three tops, and about four vest tops. Also leaf gelatine, and a DVD of The Little White Horse, masquerading under the title The Secret of Moonacre. Asda is made of win. (OK, I know, Walmart, evil corporation etc etc etc, but on the other hand, new grey cardigan and gelatine!)

♥ I spent today consulting with another screening service and building them a little database. It's beautiful, if I say it myself. Colour coded and everything. Going back tomorrow to complete it. I do always like the opportunity to work away from the office. Far, far away... Actually, that makes it sound like I don't like my job/office, which isn't true at all, but I do like to swan around. Amanda and I are going to build a website for the service, and are going to take a day to wander around the various sites taking photos etc. It'll be ace!

♥ Post today: the new Susan Elizabeth Phillips, and my 1p copy of Noel Streatfeild's Murder While You Work. Yay! Also, Helen's lent me a couple of CS fill-ins and Streatfeild's The Whicharts.

So, yes. Life not actually as dismal as previous post would indicate. In fact, pretty fucking awesome (though my laptop keyboard is still pissing me off - does anyone know any tricks for decreasing the sensitivity of a touchpad?).

- Fingers now mostly healed.

- Bed delivered and incredibly amazingly delicious.

- I have a plan for decorating the now huge and empty back wall of my bedroom. It involves Etsy and is going to be beautiful and functional.

- Had festive drinks at Jess's last night - very civilised indeed.

- Kathryn's birthday tea last weekend - also very civilised.

- Have ordered most Christmas presents, and they have started arriving. This is vee gee.

- Am not, in fact, hovering on the brink of destitution. In fact 2011 should be fairly decent. Poor arithmatic was always a failing...

- Katie and I are going to Hamlet, the Globe's Winter Wassail, and a carol service at Westminster Abbey. Thumbs up.

- I saw the GP about my strangulated whatsit on my neck yesterday. He booked for me to come in and have it lopped off with a white-hot knife. This morning, it seems to have fallen off of its own volition. Ha!

- So, I had an awesome weekend towards the end of November. On the Friday, went to see HP7.1 at the O2. It was so much better than I was expecting! I really enjoyed it, and absolutely fell in love with Hermione all over again. Then the next day, morganmuffle drove me, katie__pillar, klo_the_hobbit and seiyaharris to Stratford to see the RSC's new production of Matilda. OH MY GOD IT WAS SO AMAZING!! I was, tbh, a tiny bit leery, because the combination of Matilda, Tim Minchin and RSC had so, so much to live up to that I was afraid it couldn't possibly, but it truly exceeded my wildest expectations. The children were brilliant, and the musical itself was just magical. I will be going to see it again if it transfers to the West End, and would advise everyone else to do the same. UNLESS YOU HATE AWESOMENESS. Anyway, after that we went for tea at Chloe's parents and watched Strictly, and then came home. It was actually the most amazing 24 hours - just so lovely to do brilliant stuff with chums.

- This weekend will hopefully also be bon. Am still, admittedly, in bed, but I've been awake since about 8, which surely counts for something? Right? Anyway, cet après-midi, am off to Staines to congratulate Darren on the anniversary of his birth, then tomorrow Katie and I are off to Kingston for Christmas business, the day to be concluded by putting up the Christmas tree, watching Muppet Christmas Carol (OMG YAY), and consuming pizza and ribena cava. Good times, say you? Best times, say I.

My dear chums, so much has happened since last I wrote, but since it all happened under cover of darkness and in the course of my role as MI5's top undercover agent, I can reveal none of it. Alas.

In more mundane news, let me get you up to speed with what I've been doing:

♥ Embracing The Globe liek woah. They've had a fantastic season - I've seen Anne Boleyn (very interesting), Henry VIII (quite ponderous and processional in tone, but I think capturing very well both the grandeur and uncertainty of court life), Comedy of Errors (actually, only the first half, but it was hilarious - lovely to see it presented as the ridiculous farce it is, rather than people trying to Do Shakespeare, which is fatal because it means taking it far too seriously), Merry Wives of Windsor (amazingly funny and awesome - Mistress Page and Mistress Ford are our new heroes - it's going on tour so catch it if you can), and the superlative Henry IV parts 1 and 2 (this is on for another week - please, please go and see it if you can, it's fabulous - Roger Allam is just awesome as Falstaff, and Jamie Parker was brilliant as Prince Hal - in fact, I want them to do Henry V next time, with him, and Joseph Timms and Barbara Marten and Sean Kearns et al reprising their roles). It even inspired me to write Bardfic, which is novel.

♥ Also seeing Welcome to Thebes at the National (oh Olivier, most favoured of all theatres), which was really interesting and a little bit heart-breaking. It was by Moira Buffini, who wrote Dying For It for the Almeida a few years ago. We're going to see Hamlet in the Olivier in December - yay.

♥ Interviewing people for jobs. Hilarious.

♥ Visiting Kathye and the new baby. Baby! So cute. Am off there again tomorrow.

♥ Planning to make fig jam tomorrow. We'll see how that pans out.

♥ Making new recipes! Actual new recipes out of a recipe book! I know, it's like a tiny miracle.

♥ Other stuff.

Given that I have only so far posted once this month, I thought I might make the effort and double it. Wowzers. So, words, eh?

♥ Oh em gee, Being Human. Awesome show. Love it so much.

♥ Dancing On Ice continues to dominate our Sundays. Danniella in the skate-off, though - wtf, people? I am now resolved to stop my habit of pity-voting, it is clearly IMMORAL. Also, ITV should hire me and Katie as commentators because we rock. Also, STFU people when Jason gives people perfectly valid criticism.

♥ I had soup for lunch and soup for dinner today. Huh. Also, two slices of M&S giant hot cross bun in a loaf.

♥ Day off tomorrow - GP then off to Staines to buy ridiculous cheap scarves in the market bit (actually, assuming there is a market bit on weekdays) and t-shirts and cardigans from Matalan. I will also, natch, be visiting the old BFF.

♥ Apparently Wil Wheaton is in The Big Bang Theory again. I am very excited by this. WHEEEAAAAAAAATON!!!!!

♥ Work is still awesome in itself, though we are now having a few staffing difficulties which makes things uncomfortable. Also, mental copy-and-paste girl at the last job seems to have gone off on one again. LOL apparently it's all very haircutgate over in St John's Wood at the moment.

♥ Speaking of, it was Cath's last day last week, so I went out with them all to see Sister Act (slightly hilarious "And I don't even think it's real fake tigerskin!" with a really good set - loved it) and have dinner etc. Nice to catch up, and see everyone (especially Emma and Ben, natch). Still need to organise my leaving do. Will not be inviting Rachael.

♥ Have been reading lots of trashy romances recently and not much else. Boo.

♥ I bought a necklace on Etsy and am quite excited. It looks beautiful.

♥ In glorious news, ITV3 have started showing Heartbeat from the beginning. Oh, Nick Rowan, I'd forgotten how much I loved you!! What with that, and the X-Files and Voyager, my early evenings bear an eerie resemblance to my teenage years.

♥ ^^^ CLAUDE JEREMIAH GREENGRASS LOL

♥ Are we having a general election soon or what? I'm fed up with all the campaign post we're getting at the moment.

♥ In other televisual news, we have rediscovered the joy of Roswell. Well, I say the joy of Roswell. It's not really that, let's be honest. It's the joy of Michael and Maria. I have been reading fic. (Also White Collar fic, when I can find stuff with Neal being a woobie and Peter having to be the FRIEND WHOM NEAL TRUSTS MOST IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD etc.)

♥ Katie introduced me to Katzenjammer. They totally rock. I have listened to their album approximately fifty thousand times. I feel like everyone else should do the same.

♥ Amanda and I keep bursting into song in the office camper van. It's hilarious, but tragically we are the only ones who think so. Nobody understands our genius. WE KNEW ALL THE WORDS TO AMERICAN PIE, PEOPLE!

♥ I don't know how to bowl.

♥ I ordered vol 13 of Fables and am really quite excited about reading it. Also, I got the first issue of the spin-off thing about Cinderella, which I reckon must be finished by now, so surely that'll be out in a trade soon, right? I love her character.

♥ I keep meaning to do a post of women in TV that I love at the moment. One day, people. One day.

♥ I have a diary full of meetings now. It's slightly comical.

♥ Apparently, according to my grandmother, people are related to monkeys. Who knew?

♥ ITV had an ad for a new show with Piers Morgan. Is it wrong that I want to punch his annoying face in?