chaletian: (iron mittens)
chaletian ([personal profile] chaletian) wrote2005-12-13 03:41 am
Entry tags:

Same Time, Same Place, parts 1-2/?

Well, this is a bit weird. Crossover. Two worlds. One's the Chalet School. It's weird. Probably won't make sense to most people. But hey, I enjoyed writing it.

Same Time, Same Place

Sometimes the fabric of reality gets a little wrinkled, like it needs a good ironing. And then people talk who really shouldn't be able to.

- Who thought sisters were a good idea? I mean, really! They're mean to you, steal all your stuff, and then get their friends to knock you out.

- Gosh, that sounds rather dramatic! I can't say mine's ever done anything like that. Still...

- Still a pain, huh? It's like it's inborn in them. They can't help themselves. We should pity them.

- *giggles* I'd like to see someone try pitying M- my sister! They wouldn't get much change out of her!

- I'd say the same about mine, 'cept sometimes she goes off on a pity fest and then it's all 'oh the woe of her life'. And pretty much everyone just falls in with it, cuz she's, well, y'know, the centre of everything. *Everything* revolves around her. It's so annoying.

- I know! It's like people don't even see you, except being part of them!

- Like you're just their... their hat or something, except, alive.

- And you can't always depend on their noticing *that*! But it's so frustrating. When people talk to me, I can see it in their eyes: I'm not me, I'm her sister. And, well, I'm not even that, not really. Not properly.

- I hear ya. I know it doesn't make any difference. Usually it *doesn't* make any difference. But sometimes...

- Sometimes you just wonder if she'd be happier if you weren't.

- Yeah. That sucks. And I know it's not true. But she never had a choice, really.

- These things are forced on one.

- Yep. You can say that again! I mean, one minute you're a... but anyway, I just wish I had *something* - something to make people notice me like they do her. This one time, I thought maybe I'd got it, but it turned out it was this other girl. I'm just destined to be plain old me, the younger sister.

- Are you happy with that?

- I have to be. No, that's not what I meant. I guess I just have to decide who I want to be, you know? Cuz there's nothing that can stop me, once I make up my mind. I don't have to be like her; I can just be me.

- I'm not sure I can do that. I'm not sure who I am any more. I think I got lost a long time ago.

- Lost things can always be found.

- Maybe it's not even that. Maybe I locked myself away in my head, when it was so much easier to let her run me.

- Maybe you need to find a key. And I can't believe I said anything that stupid.

- I don't think it was. Stupid, I mean.

- I just think - you have to be in there somewhere, right?

- I suppose so. Yes, yes you're right, of course.

- Damn right I am!

- I do love her, you know.

- Hey! I know that! It's just... this isn't about them.

- It's about us.

================================

- Bum a smoke?

- Of course.

- Thanks. Ahhh, that's good. Haven't had me one of these in a while.

- Have you given up?

- Not any more. And not really. It's just this guy I'm with, has a thing about 'em. Gonna kill you one day, he says. *snorts* He needs to get a clue. I'm thinking me dying ain't gonna have much to do with a few cigarettes.

- Oh. Is he your husband?

- Jesus Christ no! *laughs* Oh man, I'd love to see his face if someone suggested it! Anyway, I'm not exactly the marrying kind, y'know? You married?

- No. That is, well, no.

- I gotta say, that's traditionally an easy question to answer.

- There's this chap. And he asked me.

- And you said...?

- Nothing, actually. Not yet. I want to!

- Kinda getting a 'but' vibe here.

- Have you done something so bad it can't be forgiven?

- Some people say there ain't nothing so bad it can't be forgiven.

- Have you? ... Well?

- Yeah.

- And it shadows everything. And you think everyone has to know. Not that they know know, but that they can see it in you.

- It stains you.

- Exactly. And part of me wishes so much that it wouldn't; that it wasn't like that. And another part of me is glad, because deep down I know I deserve it.

- But mostly you just wish you could undo the past, yeah?

- Yes. Only I can't.

- Hey, no one can.

- It's just that... things were changing, and I got lost. It's not an excuse, not for what I did, but I think it's partly why. That, and I was - unpleasant.

- Right royal pain in the ass, huh? You're hardly the first. Huh. Literally. Unless...

- Ow!

- Just checking. So, you done the usual, right? Apologised. Made people cookies. Whatever.

- Sort of. I wrote a letter. Well. More a telegram, actually.

- You talked to this people since whatever it was?

- Not exactly. At all.

- I see.

- See what?

- Hey, I get it. I mean you do stuff and people try to help...

- And you throw it back in their faces. Even if it's your best friend.

- Even if people care.

- And then you've ruined everything and you can't go back.

- Yeah. Except when you can.

- What?

- Hey, I'm not saying it's easy! Fuck knows, one of the hardest things I ever did was walk back into that house, knowing what I'd done to them, knowing that most of 'em would be happy to see me dangling in the wind. But see, thing is, if you don't do it, you never really face up to what you did.

- But I really...

- I know, I know. You're really sorry, right? You wish you hadn't done whatever it was you did. News flash, kid! It doesn't mean anything until you do something about it. You're never going to be free of it. It's gonna hang over you forever.

- So I... see them?

- Talk to 'em.

- Apologise. That's hard. You have no idea...

- I have every idea. You're gonna have to trust me on this one.

- I betrayed everyone.

- So did I. They got over it. More or less. Kid sister still hates my guts, but hey, not too keen on her myself.

- El... We shared everything for years. And we haven't spoken for almost as long. I miss her. I don't know if I could face it if she turned away from me.

- Did she before?

- ... No. I'm so ashamed. So bitterly ashamed.

- And too proud to apologise.

- That's not true!

- Sure it is. Why else haven't you?

- It's not pride. It's... it's cowardice. Are you happy now? There, I said it: I'm a coward. I always have been.

- Guess it's up to you in the end. Time dulls the edges. People forgive. Are you brave enough to try?

- I want to be.

[identity profile] willowmina.livejournal.com 2005-12-13 01:21 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm taking a guess at the crossover being Buffy (Cookies to apologise was the clue - completely missed the reference to the first) - but I'm liking it.
ext_117441: (Nightmares Crazy Straightjacket)

[identity profile] ungratefulwench.livejournal.com 2005-12-14 10:22 pm (UTC)(link)
A BIT weird? O.o That said, I quite liked them =)

I got who the first pair was, but I'm not entirely surely who's talking to Faith in the second one. Is it Len?

*still needs a CS icon*

[identity profile] chaletian.livejournal.com 2007-02-23 12:20 pm (UTC)(link)
Ah yes, see how I respond about over a year later... *g*

The second one is Faith indeed, talking to Betty Wynne-Davies.