Remember that day a stoned dog ate Evil!Dan Scott's heart? Good times.

Dear Mark Schwahn,

This is what I would like to see in the last series of One Tree Hill:

1. A ridiculous future episode, where Lily, Jamie, Madison, Chuck, Sawyer etc are the angsty teens. Jamie wearing the Scott Body Shop hoodie is a must.

2. A ridiculous musical episode. Why hasn’t this happened yet? Inexplicable.

3. A ridiculous amnesia event (possibly Nathan thinking he’s about fifteen again, for maximum angst/lolz). Why hasn’t this happened yet either? Also inexplicable.

4. A ridiculous coma event. Possibly to precede the ridiculous amnesia event. (Clay, I am afraid, was not suitably dramatic in this role.)

5. Spirit-guide!Keith. You know you want to.

6. For Dan and Nathan to reconcile tentatively then moments later Dan to sacrifice his life to save someone else. Both dramatic and karmic, plus we can all shed a tiny vicarious tear for Nathan. (Also, more Dan generally. There is not enough Dan.)

7. Alex to find someone better than Chase.

8. Hilarious hijinks from Julian’s and Brooke’s mothers, possibly involving losing their grandchildren (temporarily).

9. An, as usual, hilariously ridiculous and beautiful wedding for Quinn and Clay (don’t pretend it’s not on the cards).

10. A finale that is befitting the full glory of One Tree Hill. This will be the one where Dan dies. There might be zombies. There will be some sort of gathering at the river court (maybe after Dan’s funeral). Quite possibly Nathan and Lucas will play a bit of one-on-one (in suits, natch), because, of course, Lucas and Peyton will return, along with Karen, spiritguide!Keith, Grandma Deb, and anyone else who’s been misplaced. There will be loveliness and a spot of weepiness (not just after Dan tragically dies only moments after reconciling with Nathan). Karen’s Café will, again, be used heavily as a motif for community cohesion. Haley will sing. Jamie will have a few words of wisdom. Brooke will be awesome. Julian will be adorable. Nathan will be noble. Chester will be fluffy.

This is all. Thank you.

Love, Laura

Fanfiction is my crack.

Some recs, because I like sharing awesomeness. Maybe at some point I will tell you about my hols and what I've been up to, but that day is not today.




Toboganing Anebody [Chalet School, Gen] by RroseSelavy
I gather there was some challenge about writing Mary-Lou's accident in the style of another writer. This is perfect.
"Funker!" Emmy repli, and set off wizz down the mountain just as Mary-Lou come dashing up the slope like the skool dog after Grabber hav given it a kick.

another time (round the wheel) [Chalet School/Doctor Who, Gen] by Nightwing
What is better in this world than some timey-wimey fic? Nothing, that's what. Non-linear, confusing at first, clever, and awesome. (It's only barely a DW crossover; that part doesn't really matter.)
Someone screamed – it sounded like Con – and a babble of voices, harsh and high-pitched reached her ears. Joey quickened her pace, her heart beating rapidly from both the exertion and the frightening thoughts that were filling her head. She reached Con’s bedroom door just in time to see – “But that’s impossible,” she gasped, “there can’t be – ”

The First Year [Chalet School, Len/Reg] by Nightwing
This is adorable university!Len and Reg, with sweetness and misunderstandings (with bonus Con being ace). I have to admit a softness for Len and Reg, and this makes Reg a very sympathetic character. (If you like this sort of thing, you could also try *cough*pimp*cough* my Cherry Ripe, which is thematically not dissimilar, though inferior.)
And what did Hamilton know, Reg thought furiously as he entered his own room. He had never been in love. At least, he amended, not the same way that Reg was. Hamilton was sighing after a new girl every week, but Len was the only girl there had ever been for him. He glanced over at the stack of notepaper he'd bought, just especially for writing to Len. Maybe he should tell her so? She had only just left, it was true, but it would be a while before the letter arrived for her anyway...

Mad Medusa [Chalet School, Gen] by chattie
This is a war story, about two anonymous Chalet girls in the Resistance. A bit harrowing, actually. Beautifully done.
Only God knew what had really happened and perhaps it was better that Béatrice remained a ‘lost’ Old Girl, known to God and commemorated by this window marking her call to Higher Service.

William Brown is a fan of Theremins [Just William, Gen] by AdaptionDecay
William Brown, the eternal eleven year old, is on Facebook. As are the Outlaws. And Violet Elizabeth.
Violet Elizabeth Bott added The Outlaw's Secret Hideout to the Places I've Been application.

The Conscience of a Queen [LPW, Gen] by Ione
Harriet has to solve a mystery. Lovely Yuletide fic, with bonus Mr Ingleby and Miss Meteyard.
Before Harriet could politely demur Miss Climpson whisked herself out of her own office, her manner brisk and efficient. Harriet's protest would have been mere politeness; though she did regret interrupting Miss Climpson's obviously busy day, she also knew that Miss Climpson was never happier than when she was being of use--particularly when she could do so in a covert manner.

teach us not to be too loud [Wild Child, Poppy/Kate] by summerstorm
Written for the lovely Awesome Ladies Ficathon. I love this film and these characters.
"It'll work out for us," Poppy says, and Kate has to frown at her before Poppy realizes using the word 'us' is kind of weird when you just kissed someone out of the blue for the first time.

The Starkadder Switchback [Cold Comfort Farm, Gen]
Cold Comfort Farm meets noir detective LA. Flora has to rescue Seth from an accusation of murder. This is perfect.
The detective slammed his glass down on the desk, so the liquid licked up the sides like a drunk licks out his first hit of the day. "Lady, I don't care if you got the studios on your side. I don't care if you've got the cops. Hell, I don't care if you got the goddamn Pope - I've been out of the confessional too many years to bother about him. Your cousin killed a small-town kid with big dreams and bigger problems, and I'm going to see him fry for it."

Flora frowned. "You didn't kill anyone, did you?" she asked Seth. It was best to be certain in such matters.

Starkadder's eyes were smouldering. He looked at his cousin with a face like a bull in a bush fire. "Happen I might," he growled.

"'Happen' nothing, Seth," said Flora sharply. "This is a very serious matter, and it's no time for melodrama. Did you kill her?"

Seth glowered at her, then decided there was more mileage in glowering at the rug instead. "No," he said, sulkily.

And I have recced these before, but they're appropriate to these fictional works, and I like them, so hey.

Green Ice [LPW/Jeeves & Wooster, Gen] by adina_atl
One of the most intriguing crossovers I've ever read, this tells the story of Lord Peter Wimsey's first ever case (the Attenbury emeralds), which happens to require a visit to Market Snodsbury. Brilliantly written, and the most fascinating characterisation ever of Bertie Wooster. I recommend this unreservedly.
The second bird was not overly tall, with hair the colour of corn silk, arrayed in the outer crust of a gentleman in a style Jeeves could not but approve. It was the monocle screwed into his left eye that fired the old brain cells, however. "Flim! Flim Wimsey! I say, it's been a few years, what?"

The Subway [Narnia, Gen] by DJ Caligula
A story about Susan, post series. It's odd and a little freaky and very, very satisfying.
Susan gaped - and although her skin crawled in horror - her mind did indeed flicker back on the games that she and her siblings used to play, a long time ago. Games with kings, and queens, and centaurs and mermaids and fauns and cruel Eastern princes. God-like lions and villainous giants; unspeakably ancient cities, harsh deserts, icy northern peaks. Susan used to make maps, because she was clever at things like that, and with colored pencils and paper, she was able to create whole worlds, where forests were marked carefully with green, oceans had beasties springing out the depths, and southern cities had minarets and gates straight out of National Geographic. It had been jolly good fun, for a while, and it had helped pass the time, after they had been relocated to the countryside while London was being bombed by the Nazis.