chaletian: (five wits)
[personal profile] chaletian
1. Had a party. It was great - merci tout le monde for le coming, and suffering through Q Planes (though I maintain it is a fine, fine film - ah, ses monuments, ses cathedrales... - and I have a complete mental block about whether I've used the correct possessive pronoun there, or if I've managed to completely make up a jumble of letters). And also thank you for my presents. Presents are wonderful. Particularly in the shape of a BARRY & DICK VAN DYKE CLOCK!!!!!!

2. Have been watching beaucoup de Supernatural. I am with the loving, not least because of the total and utter prettiness of Jensen Ackles, even if he does have a slightly silly name. Still with the Dean/Faith OTP love...

3. Was most kindly given Waiting For God series 2 & 3 from The Katie (merci muchly), and for some reason I decided that a WFG/Harry Potter crossover was the way forward. Question not the way of the Squeen, for it is fraught with weirdiness...

********

“So the old coot’s dead, then,” observed the old woman, as she folded up the letter she had just read. “That’s another one gone to the great knees-up in the sky. Still, he was about three hundred and four, so I don’t suppose he had any right to complain.”

She did not expect any reply to her comments. It was Thursday, and her companion was most likely attempting as ascent of the Himalayas with Sir Edmund Hillary. Nevertheless, a reply came.

“Ooh, I am sorry, Diana! Has one of your friends passed on?” The end was whispered, and Diana rolled her eyes even as she gestured her visitor into the room.

“If you mean, is he dead and cold in his grave, Jane, yes he is. Save your soppy euphemisms for those poor buggers who have gone daft in the head. What do you want?” Jane’s chin rose, and she looked disapprovingly at Diana.

“Harvey’s very upset,” she said grandly. Diana smiled cattily.

“Oh dear, poor Harvey! Has someone been mean and nasty to the little darling? Sneezed in his morning porridge? Scratched his pretty car? Expected him to run a halfway house to the morgue?”

“He’s very upset that someone has started a petition asking the board of governors to arrange for his execution by guillotine!”

“Oh, who would do something like that to our lovely Harvey, whom we all love so much?” Jane tossed her head, looking rather like a moth-eaten pony.

“Harvey says, will you please go and see him in his office.”

“See him in his office? Jane, I am not a school girl to be summoned for a dressing down and ten strokes of the magisterial cane! If Harvey wants to see me, one of his employers, he can come and find me, and not send his pet dish cloth to come and get me. Anyway, I haven’t got time. We’re going away.”

“Going away? Going away where? And who’s we?”

“Basil the sex pest and I are going on a filthy weekend to Amsterdam, home of drugs and prostitution.”

“Really, Diana, I don’t think that’s a very good idea!”

“Neither do I, you imbecilic wench! Tom and I are going up to Scotland for a while. Let the Idiot Baines know, will you? Tell him not to sell our rooms out from under us unless he wants to be out on his ear. Now do go away, Jane!” Diana flapped her hand, and Jane disappeared, no doubt in high dudgeon. Diana levered herself out of her chair, and walked over to where Tom was sitting, eyes staring unseeingly across the Bayview gardens.

“Tom!” There was no reply. “Base camp to climbers! There’s a blizzard blowing in; you are advised to return to base camp for hot chocolate and digestives.” As there was still no response, Diana turned to cruder methods, and walloped Tom on the head with a newspaper. With a sort of squelching gasp he returned to earth, and gave her an indignant look.

“You could have killed me! I was engaged in a very tricky duel with Basil Rathbone over…”

“Never mind that,” cut in Diana impatiently. “I’ve had a letter from Scotland about an old codger I used to know about a hundred years ago. He’s dead. We’ve got to go up.”

“Up? Up where?”

“Scotland, you daft buffoon! Come on, get packing!”

“But why do I have to come? Bette Davis is expecting me for tea tomorrow.” Diana sighed.

“There’s something you don’t know about me, Tom.” He looked at her interestedly.

“Really? Did you use to be an assassin? I’ve been wondering, you see.”

“I’m not an assassin. I’m a witch.” Tom laughed.

“Well, we all know that, old girl! The Idiot Baines has it as some sort of mantra.”

Diana poked him with her walking stick. “I’m not speaking metaphorically, Tom! I’m an actual magic-using, wand-waving witch. Well, not much nowadays. Ah, the things I could do…” Her smile was beatific as she contemplated the many uses magic could have in the humiliation of Harvey Baines. Tom looked at her suspiciously.

“Are you having me on, Diana? You might be able to take in some poor idiot like Marion with that sort of thing, but…”

“Oh, for God’s sake, Tom! Why would I bother making something like this up? Now, Albus is dead, and it’s very important that we go to Scotland.”

“But who is he? An old flame of yours?”

“You could say that, I suppose. Back during the war – not yours, of course, we had one too, mad old buzzard called Grindelwald – we worked together a bit. The Order of the Phoenix, we were called. I was a photographer for the Daily Prophet, and Albus and I ran into each other every so often. At it like bunnies whenever we had the opportunity. Haven’t seen him for years.”

Date: 2006-08-29 01:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pim2005.livejournal.com
Hurrah - for you are such a *very* fine Squeen to have written this. *spins round in wheely chair cheering*

Date: 2006-08-29 02:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] vikkik.livejournal.com
Oooooh!!!
More please oh Squeenie one!
(and I'm sorry I didn't make it to the party. work is evil!)

Date: 2006-08-29 02:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nellikins.livejournal.com
ooo is there more for this is rather fine and good! AN d sorry not to make the party it sounds very fine!

Date: 2006-08-29 02:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] megaleena.livejournal.com
This is genius! more please!!

Date: 2006-08-29 04:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kathrynw.livejournal.com
Oooh...where does one get a van dyke clock?! That sounds a supremely fantastic pressie!

Date: 2006-08-29 04:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ankaret.livejournal.com
Someone over on, I *think*, the Television Without Pity forums described Jensen Ackles as looking 'like a genetic experiment gone absolutely right' and he does, he really does.

He does have a slightly silly name though.

Date: 2006-08-29 04:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] katie__pillar.livejournal.com
Haha! You wrote it! Genius.

Date: 2006-08-29 05:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dozydormouse.livejournal.com
Fantastic Liss, this gave me a truly excellent giggle when I have a pounding headache and an urge to throttle my line manager so thank you.

Date: 2006-08-30 11:31 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] allygatorkin.livejournal.com
*giggles* such a fine story!

I have just discovered there is a sequel to Schoolgirl Chums called St. Ursula's in Danger, you must find it squeenie!

Date: 2006-08-31 02:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kittykatkins.livejournal.com
Huzzah! Very very fine!

*giggling like a spoon*

Date: 2006-08-31 08:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] o4fuxache.livejournal.com
This has absolutely nothing to do with your post but I saw your "find X" icon in [livejournal.com profile] eddicons and I wanted to post it in an icon community (if that is okay with you). And if it is okay with you, who made it? And is it gankable? Thank you! :)

Date: 2006-08-31 09:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] chaletian.livejournal.com
Oh, I don't mind, but I don't know who made it, I'm afraid.

June 2016

S M T W T F S
   1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728 2930  

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Jun. 12th, 2025 10:00 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios